Sunday, April 28, 2013


I just found out, the tree that I have planted for two years, have been stolen!!! It's just really weird when things like that happens. Cause you really never thought such things would actually happens now at these times. Unbelievable!!!
I thought everyone is into politics now these. Everyone seems to be fury when they are talking about it. Hmmm....... Starting to be annoyed.
Nothing much to say though. Other than I should be doing something to my life and I gave a handjob to a Pakistani guy who thinks that he is the biggest. Straight men!!!!

Friday, April 26, 2013

Calm me down!!!

You know I was thinking of my friend yesterday. He texted me in the morning from Thailand. I was okay when he told me that he hired a boy to have sex with him. Untill he added " sedapp!!" then I felt disgusted. Not about the prostitution but the disgust is more towards him. Hiring that boy really contradict with all his believes in Malaysia. When he meets with guys, he criticized every single detail. Not just the simple overall impression of that guy but he goes into details. Like hygiene, shampoo, skin and stuff. So that makes me thinks, prostitute is okay? It's like you Are telling me that fast food is healthier than home cooked food!!!  I just despise guys that have mentality like that. It just boils my head off!!!! it's like some guys saying. "yucks! Please don't cum on me!! But can you swallow mine?" or " I'm straight!! (but when sucking him) " don't bite!! I'll slap you if you do"  Really? sLAP??? Is that a term that a straight guy uses? Even for gays, SLAP is a term, sissies or trannies use!!! 

Thursday, April 25, 2013


I specifically desires for a certain guy. When you Still don't get it? Do you still wait or alter your wish? 
Do you remember ever having these thoughts of who and what you would be. Not like a dream or goal but just some random "foresights" you see in yourself? I always have felt weird having sex with Chinese guys. I somehow felt strange. Like there would never be a connection there. I don't know why, I worships uncuts but I am more sexually attracted to Malay guys. So I have always search for Malay guys. Then ultimately, I always have felt that I almost certainly would eventually be with an Indian guy. I just plainly feels more comfortable when it comes to Indian guys. 
So now it comes down to..... Why am I not working towards my instinct? Have I lost or misunderstood the purpose of my being? Sex certainly have Made me thought that, all these while I have been searching. Does any one at all " at that moment" realize that sex is just for that moment and not for life? Have i mistook hunt for searching? If my instinct is right? That means so far I have done nothing at all to accommodate my search for my "one" 
I think what am I trying to say is that. With all the outcries that we heard of.  Not having a boyfriend. Does everyone knows what they really have been doing?  You hunt for sex or you search for a boyfriend.
Now I realize... I certainly didn't.  

Monday, April 22, 2013

Pleasantly twisted!

After my usual drink yesterday . I proceed to the park near my house. It felt kinda empty yesterday. When I reach the park. The Nasi Lemak restaurant near by was playing some melancholy songs. But it felt good. Pleasant.  Then a guy asked for ciggarates. After that he walked away. Then I just say it out loud. " you wanna have a seat?"  he rejected politely and carry on walking. Disappointed , I took a puff and looked down.
Suddenly.. I heard,  " why you ask me to sit?" hahaha....  I just answered, I just wanna chat with someone. He sat down and asked why?  And he asked do I have problems? Awwww..... So nice of him.  So I answered I have no problems but just bored.
It turns out that he is a stray, just like me. But he was there cause his gf  who lives the same row with me quarelled with her parents. So he came to be available if his gf stupidly decided to run away.
So we chatted of everything. He told me his probs and I expresses my worries of being lonely and stuff. He hugged me when I say i need a bf cause I am aging. ( that I am super shocked) the conversation  went like there is no differences between gay and straights. He even says he wants to try being blown by me  someday. I am not excited when he mentioned that cause he is attached and plus he is a genuine nice guy. We chatted from families to schools and friends and even measurements. Lolzzzzzzz.......  We chatted till 5am without realizing the time. Hmmm.... Such a gentlemen. He insisted to walk me home too, when it should be the opposite. Because I am 32 and he is just 19!!!!!

Sunday, April 21, 2013

So bloody innocent!!!!

It's so boring. I am doing everything for my mum and she stills complains that she is tired. Sometimes I think she is just saying it to create attentions from my sisters. She is tired from helping my sisters but me who didn't cause her problem gets the blame at last.  Cause when mom is tired? = me not helping. But I did!!! How twisted things could be!!!!! 

Saturday, April 20, 2013

Ariel or Andre?? BELAMIonline


If i were to choose. I will love Ariel & not Andre. Ariel is just so hot to the core. He is skinny, has nice voice and down right cute.

Friday, April 19, 2013


You know? kinda think of it, Starbucks (tiba-tiba) has always treat me good. I always have much pleasant times under Starbucks roof! LOLZzzzzz...  I always think that they feed drugs to their staffs. Cause they are always bouncy and bubbly. Hehehe......
I remembered once I had a hot session with one of their staff too. Well.. Too bad it's not from where I am sitting now. ;( anyway it happened in a toilet. The usual Orals. My turn your turn and the moment he cums. I wipe the cum off and started sucking again. I can feel that he was shocked a bit and I can feel his groin withdrawing. He couldn't take it but at the same time his hands were pushing my head deeper and he whispers " harder" " harder" the fact that he couldn't take it but he still wants it? Clicked me in so many ways. As I suck harder and the more he struggle , makes my dick swell!! I know he was in a supernatural state cause his hands were squeezing my ear so tight. His reactions turns me on so much that I could feel my penis tightens and I can feel my pre cum flowing. Then while still  deep throating him, I cum even without touching it. I moan a little. He felt it cause my cum were on his feet. He instantly pulled me up and started sucking while my cum still bursting out. I felt like tearing his hair off when he did that!! I cannot struggle much as we are in a cubicle. I can't moan loud. I only could grasp his hair and because he suck damm well, after a while I cum again in his mouth. He still doesn't let go. I really wanna push him away but my hands were pulling his head closer.  I don't know why.... My dick doesn't get tired or soft. It actually goes even more red and hard...  Sucked for a while and he finally took it out. But then he pulled back my skin and place my head right above his ear. His hair there were short. Almost bald, but you could feel it. Then he pressed my penis head against his head and with some pressure he started licking my balls. When he did that his head moves along with his action and when you feel the hair rubs against your knob?.. It was sensational!!!   It doesn't take long I came right there on his head. Oops!!! That was really out of this world. After that I heard him started moaning a little. So I know he is gonna cum. So I returned his deed this time. I totally let him cum in my mouth. Sucking it intensely. I think he bent his body into positions that I didn't know possible. I imagined that he would looks like a tree in the mids of a storm. He hug my head  so tight that I hink, if I lift my head up. He would just follow. Lzzz....

I just super love guys that could take such sensation. Many chickened out. Hehehe......

Thursday, April 18, 2013

Did you notice??

Do you ever notice this? I think the dicks on the net and also the younger generation has gigantic dicks. Through my experience too, the little young virgins, always have huge penis. It makes them looks off proportions.  sexy  in a way. The body super slim but suddenly a fat trunk hanging in between the legs. Well, I think it's okay if it's just around 8" . Don't know if I could take 9" or not but 8" I definitely can. Orals I mean. Never been fuck before. Anyway, I don't think the huge ones get to feel much cause there is a limit to everything. Stretch to the max just to enter it in the mouth, so no room to suck anymore. Only can slide. The huge ones, are getting uber humongous now. It's almost irrelevant.  I think the smaller ones always moan louder, because the mouth of the other party down there can do wonders when there are more space. LOLZzzzzz....
 I heard the funniest explanation from an uncle once. The reason the penis are getting bigger now, it's because they eat lots of KFC! Hahahhahah

Wednesday, April 17, 2013

My Girl friend

I had a friend. A girl that I use to share room with years ago. So recently she met a guy. Lets call him Z.   Z is a little unknown celebrity. Very fast they became "One night stand" buddies. Few days ago  Z's brother texted my friend through FB. Asking her out for a drink. My friend thought it was sweet but its also weird at the same time. My friend told me about it and I thought it was cute but I think its best she inform Z. Just a little FYI. He has no right to stop her if she wants to go out with him anyway.  She then informed Z about it and Z was okay with it. In fact he laughed about it.
Yesterday my friend got a call from Z. Asking her out for a drink with his brother. So my friend agreed and thought it was a nice gesture of Z and kinda sweet.  My friend still feels weird though, of the brother situation thingy. Anyway she reached the place and they had drinks and they were laughing about it. So at the mids of it... Z's brother went to the loo. Z then holds my friend's hand and start whispering to her. Z actually ask if my friend would have sex together with his brother.
hUH??? I know both of them are damm sexy but I really don't think that is possible and really? Really a guy would really do that? Fuck the same girl with his brother at the same time???  If I am my friend? I'll just walk away or go home, but my friend did manage to stay and decline and have a good time. According to her.... She doesn't want to loose a good fuck!!! Hahahhaahah..... Ah well, as long as she knows how to guard her flower then I am okay with it.

Tuesday, April 16, 2013


Am at Starbucks now. One guy is caressing his bulge while looking at me but I am looking right through him. Cause there is a super hot guy in green Topman sitting right behind him. Hehehe..... Anyway.... I got the shocked of my life today. Was peeing and there is this old man.... Properly dressed came stand beside me. He was hard when he took his penis out. Then he tried to look at mine. When he notice I was looking at him, he smiled and reach for my dick. I dodge. Then at that split second, I thought. He is old. Most probably he never get sex anymore or maybe he has to pay for one.  After all that I've got, so I should give back. So I thought I would do some charity. Then when he reach for it again, I let him. Then he went all excited and breathing hard. I am so afraid that he is gonna have a heart attack and fainted beside me. So with all the movement. I told him to continue in the cubicle. Then I went in first. Waited a while and I didn't see him. So I went out again and he is standing in front of the mirror. So I looked at him with a question mark face. Then he walked passed me with the worst look ever. He looked at me like I am so dirty or it's like he despises gays. Like he hated me so much. It was the dirtiest grin I ever saw in my life. I was so bloody surprised!!! Here I am trying to do some charity.. Here i am trying to give back to the world!!! And he gives me this shitty reaction??? 

Monday, April 15, 2013


I dreamt of Samir yesterday. Nothing to brag about cause he cheated on me in the dream. :( Anyway kinda wanna talk about my cousin. 26yr.  Lives at Damansara Perdana. Kinda see him like 3 or 4 times a year. So this time, i saw him at my aunt's funeral yesterday. He is super weird. He is kinda sticky to me.  He likes to hug me but he is straight. We were never close. All these while i think it's just an act. You know how we always pretends to be friendly during family meet ups. 
So yesterday i saw him again. His gesture were different this time. I don't know what happened to him. He suddenly turned super big and huge. His hands are huge. So when he holds me, I FELT WEAK. Melted. It felt like HULK were holding Captain America. I mean the comparison of sizes, he being Hulk and me being Captain America (ahemm) Then the whole day his hands were around my waist and stuff. He makes me feels like i am a little girl. Then the whole day he stands beside me. Passing me drinks and food. Maybe he is still acting like usual. But you don't treat your male cousin like a girl right? I am definitely not sissy. I am not being weird right? I am not feeling this because i am all fucked up with boiling hot hormones right? He is really being too close right? OWH... kinda think of it ... he does treats his girlfriend exactly the same way.. well way stickier of course. 
I still do misses Samir though,  but part of me doesn't wish that he comes back. 

Saturday, April 13, 2013


'Attending Aunts funeral later @ Malacca.
'@Night* Coming back to Subang .
'Tomorrow* Heading back to Malacca for the funeral
*Monday* Start production!! 
  "if i don't need to babysit my nephew." 

Thursday, April 11, 2013


Okay. I don't know what am I feeling, but I am feeling it. There is this Pakistani staff at this mamak near my place. He has this fucked up face. He is ugly and he has teeth like Venom. Really!!! But every time he takes my order I felt this sensual thirst and I am actually thinking of fucking him!!! He gives out this mysterious dangerous vibe that makes me blush. wTF!!! Is it the teeth or is it because he looks like Venom. Or I am just desperate,,!! lOLZzzzzz.........

Tuesday, April 9, 2013

Budge Boy!!!

Owhkaay.., Let's let it begin then!!!
I've been slothing around too much. I think i have to budge myself!!
Still feeling lazy though.. hhrrmmm!!!

Monday, April 8, 2013

Just What You Think?

Your boyfriend checks on your phone once and found out you flirts with another guy. 
What would your reaction be? Do you trust your bf again ( cause he checks your phone). How bizarre your reaction would be?  Leave everything aside, in your opinion, do you think, that should be done at all?? 

Sunday, April 7, 2013


Drunk?? nahh... just tipsy. Boy says he thought of trying new stuff. Boy wants to be fucked and try fucking. Then guy says he really wants to fuck and be fucked. Even both are side by side and wanted the same things but still it never occur to them that they should just do it to each other. So when one complains that they can't or never get such things?? Is it the world's fault or it's their own fault?