Friday, December 30, 2011

It's Nerve Wrecking

Lol..."maybe". I am Going to KLCC tomorrow to have dinner and watch the fireworks after that. I know 1.5 years is a very long time for the retail world and many could have change. Still i have the freaks to go back there, besides i know some of my friends are still working there. I always tried to avoid going there cause of my physical changes due to my medications. This time i just kinda don't give a shit but as the days are nearer, i grew weaker. Hahhaah....  Not that i hope i don't see my friends again but i hope i am visually pleasant to look at. :) It felt kinda nude...in a way!!! What are you guys doing? Eh? Tom morrow is new year eve right? 

Thursday, December 29, 2011

I Need A Stranger.

Hahah... i actually ended up not really relating the content with the title. LOL...... well actually what i meant to say is that, with me getting so angry all the time really makes me really tired. Again i also feel bloody childish about these petty stuff, but if you think about it. Because it's childish, the more an adult shouldn't be practicing it. Well...humans are bloody creative. They can create problems even when they are not doing anything. Well as i am all worked up and tired. I think it was last week. There is this one day i was alone at home. I couldn't sleep at around 3a.m. Bored i decided to walk out to 7E at Taipan. Not the one nearer to me but it's actually the further one. I always wanted to walk. Walk alone. To feel the peace and quiet. That is the perfect time. So i did it. I walk to 7E and bought a pack of ciggy and a can of drink. Then when i walked out of 7E. Spontaneously i sat on the stairs in front of 7E to take a puff. I then kinda went into some deep thoughts without realizing one of their staff is outside cleaning the glass window. Then suddenly i heard, " Can't sleep sir?"  I looked back and smiled. We chatted for around half an hour. Amazingly the conversation covers many areas. Sometimes you would never know what a stranger could do to you. This stranger actually helped to calm me down and a stranger can't really judge you cause they don't know you. They just could judge right or wrong no bias. Besides this stranger didn't even try to solve my probs but just listens. All he does was listen. Then suddenly i realized how much i have longed for such conversations to take place. I wept. I actually wept because i never felt so at ease in a very long time. Of course i didn't cry in front of him la. While i was walking back. 

I Need A Stranger.

I have become very feisty lately. I seem to be angry at many stuff. Many many stuff. It's really not me getting crazy but these are genuine cases to be angry about. My friend would tell me, "well, those are just small cases. Let it go and forget about it" but it's not one big problem but it's a thousand of small little petty problems add together!!!!
I'm not making up my anger nor i am being high maintenance. No doubt the problems are genuine and  everyone is aware of their mistakes. The thing is i get very, very angry over it,  till sometimes my hands shakes when i'm in the anger mode. This is also the weird part,  because i get so angry then everyone automatically makes it like i am being a baby!!!
How would this help to strengthens a family bond? You know you are wrong but because i get angry a lot so you ignore me and leave the problem to be solved by nature? Do you ever think that i will get upset and wonder why are you not listening?  Do you ever think that it will challenges and pushes  people's limits? Am i really not talking sense here? Am i not civilized?  Yeah i know i am always at home. I does the house chores. It doesn't mean "oh that's why" but instead .... you should think that you already above 30's. Leaving a stool right in front of the front door is not the solution. I know at this point my friend would tell me, "Just move the stool and problem solved" But my problem is that if before i get to do it. and so happens my sister wants to walk pass the door. my sisters would actually rather hop across than physically moving it away. It was used by her and not only she doesn't want to returned it back but she just ignore it's presence even it's actually blocking her. Please tell me people. I don't know what to think at this point. 

Sunday, December 25, 2011

Greetings

Greetings Everyone. Many stuff has happen these times. Not necessarily bad stuff generally good. Hahhah.... My eyes surgery went well and recovering positively.  I think there is something that my Doc aren't telling me but i think that's the worries that's gonna happen in the future. Been quite less productive lately. I think it's because everything are moving like a snail. So now i am trying to spark a spark in me, so that i will be super productive. I am sorry that i can't post before, and thanks for you guys who concerned. It actually felt super nice and warm. 

First and foremost...."Merry Christmas"

Super Merry Christmas to every soul.