Remember the Security guard that i mentioned about? the sexy security guard that lets me suck? He is leaving Malaysia in November. Relocating at Germany. Hmm... and i thought that i finally found a sex partner Well sort of, cause he is straight. Though it's all i can suck but it's gonna end soon. I don't like these feeling of "it's gonna end soon". I bloody hope that i am not going to be emotionally attach to him in any ways!! He was acting weird yesterday though. He kept on stares at me when i am not looking. He says that he wants to know more girls and hope that i could introduce some of my girl friends. Ishh... Such a retarded evening!!
I felt that whatever that i've done recently, is all purely just to sabotage myself. This is crazy. I am not being productive at all. I felt so heavy. Being sleepless isn't helping at all. It's such a nuisance really. What's worst, i felt like eating big chunks of meat all the time. It's not the taste that i am craving for but it's the feeling of my teeth sinking into the chunks of boneless meat that i am craving for. Lolzz.... nuts!!
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